Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Gamers and Gaymers

Another large part of the reason I've been such a loyal BioWare fan for so long is, admittedly, a little bit self-centered. Being that I am a woman, it is no surprise that I tend to particularly enjoy games in which I can play a strong female character, but even beyond the ability to choose my character's gender is the significance of sexual orientation. Being that I am also both transgender and lesbian, I have grown accustomed to game developers specifically refusing to acknowledge my existence. BioWare was (and, I hope, still IS) one of the very few companies that not only acknowledges its LGBTQ fans but actually caters to them directly.

As "choice" is a huge part of what BioWare has traditionally brought to the table, they have also added options for LGBTQ players to enjoy, including the ability to choose supporting characters of the same sex to pursue a romance storyline with. This is, of course, exploited, at times, by people who get "turned on" by seeing two members of the opposite sex "getting it on," as it were, but usually the romances are typically short on the actual "sex" side of things, meaning that anyone that goes to that length for their own pornographic interests ultimately gets a pretty weak pay-off. The result is that, while some people simply get off on it, many of us in the LGBTQ community genuinely feel like, for once, we're not being totally ignored.

In a culture infused with homophobia, sexism, and harassment, as gamer culture often is, it is extremely refreshing to feel like you're being acknowledged. In my own personal experiences, I have had many instances in which I have felt like people were deliberately ignoring me, even denying my very existence. It grates on your psyche more than people who are not members of a minority can ever really understand. It can feel so fulfilling to see someone you can relate to in a place where you have grown so used to not seeing it. I had actually thought, at one time, that I didn't like romance at all. And then I actually saw a lesbian-themed romantic film and discovered that - holy shit! - it all suddenly makes sense!

BioWare is, of course, not the only company that has given acknowledgments to the LGBTQ community. There have been others as well, such as Bethesda and Lionhead Studios, in particular. Yet, for every game developer that makes a game with characters that identify as anything other than cisgender (that is, "not transgender," for lack of a better term) and heterosexual, it seems as though there are a hundred that would much rather pretend we don't exist. And while it's fine to not have positive LGBTQ characters in every game - after all, it'd be hard to have any sort of narrative variety if everything were required to incorporate such things - it becomes potentially destructive to have so few, because to ignore an entire group of people only manages to make them feel unwanted, and feeling unwanted can lead to depression, to say the least. I have known many people who have either committed or attempted suicide because they didn't feel that could talk to anyone about their problems.

But there is also the other side of the culture to contend with: the consumers. Many, though by no means all, gamers can be extremely hostile to others, particularly in online gaming, where "trash talk" has become part of the norm. Often, the "trash talk" includes sexual harassment, insinuations of another player being homosexual, and outright homophobic slurs. This is something that needs to be fought against. We, as a community, need to stop giving players that behave in this manner any reason to persist. The best way to do this is simply not to play with them. When they discover that everyone who joins their games immediately leaves their games, it becomes harder and harder for them to keep it up. Eventually, they either get the message and stop doing it, or they don't and they continue playing on their own.

There is one other thing that can be done to counter homophobia in gamers. Whenever you can, try to confront a person about it. If they seem to just want to be hostile, don't bother, but if you can get them to step back and think for a second on their attitude, it just might be possible to convince them to change. Perhaps I'm too much of an idealist, but I feel it is not okay to simply walk away, because to do so is almost as bad as saying it's okay, so long as you aren't around.

Bullying is a big problem, and we can do a lot to prevent bullying of LGBTQ gamers by standing up and pointing out the bullies. It is on all of us, I think, to change the culture to be more positive and welcoming of peoples of all different walks of life, because the consequences of not doing so can be more damaging than some realize.

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